Waiting In Vegas

Tonight a table spent their entire visit attempting to guess my weight. It was a party of 3, which consisted of a middle aged mother and her two grown children. The situation was weird to say the least. Their first guess was only 5 pounds too high. I told them that they were in the [...]

My last job was also in a restaurant located inside a casino. The restaurant was divided into 10 stations, each station had an average of 7 tables. One of these stations consisted of waiting on bar patrons (station 1). To understand exactly how fucking stupid station 1 was you will need a little insight. The [...]

Today Curly Sue (a white male server) was waiting on a table of 4 black men. One of them needed a refill and flailed his hands around to get Curly Sue’s attention. When Curly Sue didn’t notice, the man shouted “Hey white boy!” After the guest requested his refill, Curly Sue replied “Sure thing brother.”

After years of waiting tables in Las Vegas it takes a lot to truly shock me. In fact it has been quite some time since I’ve witnessed something so outlandish and disruptive that it was automatically committed to memory. This is partly due to my many years of experience but mainly due to the fact [...]

I have previously touched on the subject of passive aggressive notes being left on the table after a guest leaves. Today Divine received such a note, after she had already withstood a verbal tongue-lashing from a guest. Something you should know if you have IBS or some kind of urine retention problem: MOST casino restaurants [...]

Every Wednesday night our restaurant runs an all-you-can-eat rib special. Our chef’s idea of all-you-can-eat means using the largest plate possible and filling it with enough food to feed a family of four Americans or an entire village in Africa.  This particular special comes with two full racks of ribs and a giant mound of [...]

Since my last blog post Gaysian has been completely obsessed with his new celebrity status. I tried to convince him that a story featuring him on this blog by no means makes him famous but my effort was in vain. Not only did featuring him make him the most giddy gay of all time but [...]

Earlier I received this facebook message from Gaysian. Subject: So here’s some potential fodder for your blog. I was gonna write it as a comment but didn’t want to risk getting fired! Woman: (think drunk blanch (RIP) from golden girls) i want a burger well done. Me: okay, would you like any fries or onion [...]

Fight nights are the worst. The worst clientele flock to Vegas to watch two grown men beat each other up over a million dollar purse. I simply don’t get it. The only fight that I am really interested in witnessing would be between two gay men in feather boas, tights, and tiaras fighting over a [...]

Tonight I waited on four guys who were in their early twenties. They were polite enough. They weren’t demanding or obnoxious and they each said please and thank you. They also flirted a bit. I should tell you first that I am horrible at fake flirting. I am not one of those servers who knows [...]